Jul 23, 2020 | Your Relationships
This has not been easy...
Have you noticed that I’ve been talking a lot recently about relationships?
At first, it was simply what was on my heart and relevant in my life and in the conversations I’d been having, but then I realized it’s so much larger than that…
We have a relationship to everything and to everyone in life, ranging from our relationships with ourselves, our partners, and time, to our money, energy and businesses.
We have a responsibility to look at who we are being in those relationships. Are they in alignment with how we want to show up in the world?
Our relationships are emotional in nature (and often tied to our past-based subconscious programming and experiences), so we often complicate them or put the onus outside of ourselves.
But at the end of the day, we always (and only) have a say in how we want to show up and whether our relationships and partnerships support or hinder us to do so.
Personally, I have been making some BIG changes in this area.
For the past 6 years, I have been serving as a coach trainer with the organization with whom I trained. I created many incredible relationships and generated massive growth in this community. In January, I made the decision to fully step back from this role in order to focus on my own creative pursuits and my vision for Unbounded Potential™.
Earlier this week, I announced that the doors of PACK Retreats are closing. This second business was a true labor of love and passion. Over the past 3 years, we have led 4 incredible and life changing retreats to the Dominican Republic and India. I formed lifelong friendships with many of our travelers and and observed them grow inseparable bonds with each other! In 2020, we filled and were preparing to lead 3 trips to Greece, Peru and southern India. Unfortunately, COVID-19 led us to reconsider.
Needless to say, these decisions have been hard, sad and fear provoking at times.
It has taken me countless conversations with my own coach and doing my own personal work, to get to this place. If you too are considering the ending or reinvention of a business relationship or partnership, I feel you!
We are often scared to make big changes, but the future is far greater than our fear if we are willing to lean in.
We often fear changing the status of our relationships for the fear of losing them completely, this has certainly been true for me.
And while some relationships and partnerships naturally come to an end, there always exists the possibility of reinvention or the possibility of creating something even more beautiful and aligned than you could have ever imagined.
As we step into being more aligned and authentic with ourselves, we naturally create relationships with others that are a reflection of that. I believe romantic relationships are a very common example of this and easy to observe or have reflected by loved ones.
I believe that COVID-19 has led many of us to examine the quality of our relationships in our live, from how we operate in our relationships with our time, with our significant others and business partners, with our friends and family, and of course with ourselves.
Do not lean away from this invitation in fear.
Let me repeat: we are often scared to make big changes, but the future is far greater than our fear if we are willing to lean in.
The start of 2020 has been filled with incredible creativity, spiritual alignment, and authenticity for me. I have been finding my voice and creative expression in ways that I know are the direct consequence of the changes I’ve been making.
This most certainly would not have been possible, had I not been willing to lean into the unknown of me. It’s not to say the changes have been comfortable or easy decisions to arrive at. The sense of realignment and creative expression has been ever present as I have.
If you know that the time is now to make some big changes in your relationships and partnerships and you’ve been resisting, here are some questions to reflect on:
- What are you not being responsible for in how the relationship came to be? What behavior or action do you see to change that could impact the quality of the relationship?
- Where are you choosing from in the relationship? How are you choosing from fear? Fear of loss, hurting others feelings, offending others?
- How do you struggle with the discomfort of saying no or honoring your own boundaries?
- How are you being inauthentic? What is there for you to say that you have left unsaid?
We must close one chapter to begin the next one. We may find the same characters present or we may discover new ones, but we will never know until we turn the page and begin.
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Catherine is a Master Certified Coach and bestselling author of Belonging: Overcome Your Inner Critic and Reclaim Your Joy.
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