Nov 14, 2018 | Your Relationships

Catherine A. Wood

Comparisonitis: Friend or Foe?

March is Women’s History Month, and in honor of that I’ve been thinking about a topic that I discuss frequently with my clients of late. It’s one of my favorites (it’s a new coaching term I’ve dubbed in fact) and it’s called comparisonitis.

You might have an inkling of what this means… It’s the idea of comparing ourselves in order to prove our intelligence, our capability, our worth, etc.

You know. Not a common condition for you, I’m sure.

In honor of it being Women’s History Month, I’d like to point out that this is something we as women do all the time. We try to prove ourselves based on comparison to someone else and what works for her.

Can you actually imagine what would be possible for you if you were to stop comparing yourself to and against the other powerful women in your network? If instead you were to start practicing comparing you against you?

In Jim Rohn’s wise words, You are the average of the five people you spend the most time with.”

So imagine if we surrounded ourselves with others—women, in this case—who called us forth, called us to be our best, and if we also demanded that of ourselves. I can only imagine the impact that would make in our day-to-day life because we’d constantly be encouraged, supported, loved, and acknowledged.

The way I end all of my coaching calls is by acknowledging my clients, and one thing I consistently notice is that we as human beings are wildly under acknowledged in life.

Acknowledgment is simple and normal, but when I start working with new clients they’re oftentimes intimidated and overwhelmed when I ask them to share with me what they would like to be acknowledged for.

I imagine that if we put down this comparisonitis tool and just started acknowledging each other and ourselves with self confidence and ease, we would shift away from the negative pressures and instead be a positive, motivating force. We could put down this disempowering measuring stick—a tool that we use to compare and gauge our worth.

So, in honor of all women, I invite you to honor yourself today, honor the people you choose to surround yourself with, and choose to love yourself and build one another up. Let’s stop being tools and forces in a culture and society that weighs and pushes each other down.

Please share in the comments below, what is your thing you’d like to acknowledge yourself for?

To being a positive, motivating force,

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