Mar 15, 2019 | Your Business, Your Relationships

Sorry not sorry. You are ultimately responsible for all of it [Lesson Learned #3]

I think one of the hardest lessons I’ve learned in business (and to be honest I’m still learning this one) is the notion that I’m ultimately responsible for all of it.

I’ve had enough coaching calls with my own coaches, colleagues, and mentors at this point that I could write a book detailing all the ways in which it’s not my responsibility.

How I really didn’t have enough time, or how this circumstance really was absolutely unreasonable and out-of-the-ordinary. Oh, POOR ME!

The bottom line is that ultimately, it’s always my responsibility.

I’ve created more excuses than I’d like to recount to let myself off the hook for all of it.

But the thing is there will always be circumstances that get in the way, and they’re not going to change until we do.

Learning the lesson of personal responsibility has been, by far, the most difficult and well-won lesson I’ve learned as a business owner.

Here’s the thing, as soon as you start listening for this in your day-to-day life, you will begin to hear just how common playing the victim is.

Every time you blame it on the traffic, or the metro being delayed, or that person not getting back to you, or the birthday party at the office that caused you to eat two slices of cake, you are playing the victim.

That, darling, is the tough love simple truth.

I know I’ve felt entitled to play the role of victim in so many ways…

→ When I never received a response from that email
→ Or my partner said he would do x, and he didn’t
→ Or when I worked 10 hours on a task and I still didn’t achieve the desired result.

But at the end of the day, who cares?

Your victim-status may make you feel better about your current reality because you have one more person who will collude with you and who will buy into your excuses.

But it will be temporary.

Ultimately, your experience will never change until you change it.

That starts and ends with taking responsibility for all of it. The good, the bad, and the ugly.

I know, it might feel great to be right, to make someone else wrong. (Heck, I did it for years!)

But this strategy will run out, even if playing the victim has been effective for you in the past.

It will run out. I don’t know when, but I guarantee you, it will.

Learning to take an unstoppable stand for myself and what I’m creating in the world is something that continually makes me proud of myself.

And ultimately, it’s given me freedom.

Freedom to not be so negatively impacted by others and their choices; freedom to express myself; freedom to give up resentments and blame; and the freedom to be fully myself.

Start listening to yourself. How can you show up in life and own responsibility for all of it?

Responsibly yours,

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Mindful Spending & Navigating Lifestyle Creep with Cris Caruso

In this episode of the Prosperous Empath®, I’m sitting down with financial advisor and UNBOUNDED Mastermind Alum, Cris Caruso to talk about a phenomenon that many people have experienced in recent years: lifestyle creep. Cris has been in the financial services industry since 2004 and a financial advisor since 2008. Beyond that, she has pursued additional education in understanding how our behaviors shape financial outcomes by earning the Behavioral Financial Advisor designation from Think2Perform. She also earned the Accredited Domestic Partnership Advisor credential prior to 2015 as a way to support her LGBTQIA+bclients and continues to use this knowledge to work with unmarried couples and non-traditional families. You’ll appreciate her unique experience throughout today’s episode as she speaks on lifestyle creep, or lifestyle inflation, which is overspending on things that you don’t actually need as your income increases. When you’re early in your career, your spending habits focus on must-haves like housing and groceries. But as your income increases, it’s easy to lose track of what is a necessity and what are simply too many luxuries, and to just keep buying more. Cris and I discuss both values-based and practical strategies on how to identify the areas of your life you should spend generously on and where to be more mindful to reach your long-term goals. How do you live in alignment with your money, especially as an entrepreneur and an empath? You’ll get an answer to this question as you listen to our thought provoking conversation on purposeful spending, the importance of allowing yourself to have fun & fabulous experiences, and more.

Visit this episode’s show notes page here.

The Prosperous Empath® Podcast is produced by Heart Centered Podcasting.

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