The Rooted Renegade: Exploring Somatics and Holistic Success with Rebecca Arnold

Catherine A. Wood 00:02
I Rebecca, welcome to the podcast.

Rebecca Arnold 00:04
I’m delighted to be here.

Catherine A. Wood 00:10
This feels like such a monumental conversation because I feel like I’ve been talking with you about your book for so many months and years. And now it’s coming to fruition. It’s here, really. And I’m so excited to have this conversation about your book, the route and Renegade transform within disrupt the status quo, and unleash your legacy. And, by way of getting us started, I gave you a little bit of a heads up notice, but I’d love for you to lead us in an exercise to lead me in an exercise from your book as a way to get us to get us connected, and maybe in our own bodies, which is a lot of what I loved most about your book.

Rebecca Arnold 01:01
I am happy to do that. And excited to do that. I think one of the missing pieces for a lot of us is the embodied component. So I’m excited to be leading you and your listeners through this. It’s a very simple exercise. And so although you’re going to start doing is imagine that you are stressed and don’t want to be, and you probably don’t even have to imagine that heart. So you might notice as you tune in that your shoulders are creeping up towards your ears, or that your neck and head are pushed forward and down. Your jaw might be set tight. Your butt might even feel clenched that’s mine. or whichever is your unique physical manifestation of stress. So just allow yourself to tune in to any of those signals of stress that are typically yours. Now I invite you to do just the opposite. Roll your shoulders down and back. Adjust your neck and head upright, wiggle your jaw to loosen it. Relaxed your Yeah, and relax your butt. This one’s a little tricky. So if you clench your butt first, really intentionally and then relax it, it’s a little easier sometimes to relax at them. Notice the nuances of body positioning that are your unique physical signatures of peace. It might be that your chest feels broader and more relaxed, it might be that your shoulders are down. It might be that your eyes are soft. Whatever it is just notice, you likely immediately feel calmer, even if not one thought changes. All that we did here was to have stressful, what was stressful in your body, and then what felt relaxed in your body. And so anytime you notice those stress signatures popping up that tightness, you can just do the opposite, and relax and release them. If you start to think fearful or stressful thoughts, again, after you do this, your body will slingshot right back to its stressful stance. And that’s fine. That’s what your body does, naturally, the opportunity and the invitation is just to simply relax and release and leave those areas that feel tight. And that’s it.

Catherine A. Wood 03:30
I had this experience when we were reading the book for our book club in the inbound mastermind, that it was just so nice to like, connect with the body in the moment. Because I feel like so often when we’re reading a book, especially about personal development and leadership, it’s often a place for us to default to the intellectual knowing. And so to have an invitation which your book provided countless invitations to practice in the moment and and really apply what we’re reading about. In in really while we’re reading it. It was such a nice, like more of an interactive read than most of the reads.

Rebecca Arnold 04:18
Yeah, I love that. And I’ve heard that from a lot of folks that it’s like once they start to dig in, they feel like they’re one person said it was like a novel except I’m the one changing throughout the main character, because of this felt sense of using these exercises and really exercises and really practicing what’s happening instead of just theoretically or intellectually as you said,

Catherine A. Wood 04:41
yeah. Okay, well, so I’m, I’m happy that that’s where we started. It feels like a nice way to even just ground together to really have this conversation from an embodied place. Because that’s what we’re going to be talking about a lot on this on our podcast today. So So, you’ve, you’ve come on the podcast before, but for those of our listeners who haven’t yet tuned in to your prior episode, I’d love for you to share your pronouns. And a little bit about your story.

Rebecca Arnold 05:15
Sure, my pronouns are she, her, and thank you for asking. So I came to coaching through a, I like to refer to it as a colossal burnout experience. That had all been the like dramatically leaving my job falling apart, emotionally, physically, it was a really painful experience that I had to do a lot of work to rewire and change the narrative on and do some really deep work around. And when I came out of that experience, I What was really hard was that I burned out from what I felt was my dream job. And so when that happens, there was a complete vacuum of purpose. I was like, I just achieved the thing that I had been working so hard for. And now, now that I don’t have that, what am I going to do with myself? And how am I going to show up in a way that I can impact people’s lives for the better and not burnout in the process. And so I did a lot of inner work and reflection and came to coaching, which felt like a way to integrate a lot of my interest in personal development, psychology, law, social impact, and all of that until one practice that feel that really lights my soul ablaze and gets me thrilled to come to my desk and work with clients. So that’s a short snippet. I know, you know, many, many stories, both from our coaching work together and from reading this book. But that, to me really was the impetus for pursuing coaching and the thing that I come back to again and again, with my clients of really wanting to support them to stay in their current roles, where they’re making a huge impact without compromising their well being and their priorities outside of work.

Catherine A. Wood 07:06
It actually makes me wonder how that’s connected with your inspiration for writing the book. Right? Like? How was that experience of of burnout to finding your cat your your own souls work? Connected with becoming writing the routed Renegade?

Rebecca Arnold 07:30
Yeah, so the book, I just want to give a quick kind of overall framework for the book so that I can answer that to help people kind of around a little bit and, and how it’s broken out. The first section is about internal peace, how do you ground your body and develop more internal resilience? The second piece is around how to cultivate existential peace, how to look at what makes your soul blissful. What are you here to do? What brings you fulfillment? Where are your values, all of that. And then the third part is relational piece, both with yourself and with other people. So when I look at burnout, so there are systemic causes of burnout, of course, there are organizations that are demanding too much of employees, and not keeping pace with the having organizations not keep pace with how they need to really support people comprehensively. And then I think there are also these internal components of burnout, which are your mindsets that break you down, the not being aligned in terms of the values at work, not knowing how to calm your nervous system. And so when I look at how the book is broken down, I find components of my own burnout in each of those. So I wasn’t doing a great job recognizing the internal toll of stress and taking care of my body effectively, and knowing how to metabolize stress. Well, I also was feeling this aligned with the values at work. And I wasn’t really present to that and the toll that it took. And then I was having a lot of relational relationship challenges with other people. And my relationship with myself was like, garbage. I just, I beat myself up all day long. And so when you zoom out and look at burnout, sort of like, of course, I burned out how could I not? It’s almost like I was going 80 miles an hour with a wheel kind of off the track. So it was no surprise when I look back on it. But in the moment, it did not. I wasn’t aware of what was going on. And so I’d say it was really integrated with my story in the book. So

Catherine A. Wood 09:26
something I I’ve shared that this this with you already but something I really appreciate from your book is how many exercises you integrate throughout every aspect of these three, these three parts of peace that you refer to. And I’m wondering like when you were on your own journey of burnout, how many of these tools did you have access to? Or how many did you in hindsight, realize they would have made a difference? Like how did you kind of craft How did you craft these three components of Have Yeah. How did you craft the three components? And how did you adapt? Practices for for all of them? Because really like, I mean, I’m excited for our listeners to read your book. But there’s dozens and dozens of exercises in your book. It’s kind of like a Gosh, what is one of our colleagues call it a coach’s nice

Rebecca Arnold 10:23
nightstand Bible. And they stand Bible. It’s amazing. Okay, so there are a lot of ways to tackle this. So I’m trying to pick up the best one. Because the framework actually emerged as I was writing it, I didn’t start from a framework, and that is very meat, very ADHD, me, which is like, what a lot of stuff out there and see what kind of shakes out. And then retrospect, I always have a dog. Of course, this is the framework, but I’m not the I’m the The pants are not outliner. When you think about when novelists talk about writing, there are some folks that outline the whole thing. And there are other folks that just write and then an emerges, I’m the ladder. I had very, very few of these practices when I experienced burnout, very few. I mean, I’ve been in therapy for years. But the kinds of practices that are in the book, I developed through my own coaching with clients practices that I found were helpful to them when I was doing one on one work, things I’ve been exposed to along the way. So I’m kind of like a I make exercises very easy. I could You could ask me for 10 exercises on some topic, and I could just machine drop them out for you. Like I just That’s how my brain works. And so it was not hard for me once I understood what I wanted folks to get out of this book to generate practices based on the experiences I have with clients, things I do for myself, and things I’ve picked up along the way. And these were all things I wish so badly that I had when I was going through burnout, because I felt really alone and didn’t know where to turn or what to do. My therapy was great. But it was really just processing instead of moving forward and understanding more tools I can take with me. Well,

Catherine A. Wood 12:15
I think that’s that really highlights something that I was struck by in reading your book because you share a story in your book, which I’ve already reached out to you about privately but it’s like the the role that forgiveness played in your life and the role that forgiveness helped heal your relationship with your dad. And and when you share that story in the book like you, you occur like you had so much perspective to be able to process it in real time. And and so I guess I’m wondering like, is that true? Is that how it was for you? Did you feel like this forgiveness work that you did was with your father was self inspired? Was it self necessitated? What was the real motivation?

Rebecca Arnold 13:15
Yeah, so in the story, I tell this, in the book, I tell the story of my dad who had ALS, and, and had, he was diagnosed with narcissism and bipolar disorder and caused a lot of havoc in our family throughout my life. And I had worked for years on my relationship with him and therapy, and had made a little bit of progress. But there were so much I was holding on to so much anger and resentment and disappointment in my body that I was just unable to let go up. And he basically had a timeline that was very short, remaining like we knew that his als was progressing very fast. And I knew I just probably only had a few months left to live. And I was deeply committed because of my values, to say goodbye to him in a deeply felt way. That wasn’t out of obligation, but was out of my appreciation for who he had been when I was little that was really what I could latch on to in terms of what I appreciated about him. And so I just decided I was going to undertake this month’s long forgiveness process to go through every single thing I was hanging on to about him and do the process a little bit elaborate. But I went through each one of them remembered what it was like remember my emotional experiences with it, and then offered Him forgiveness and did some embodied practices to release the energy of that. So it took me I mean, literally months because I went through a couple incidents each day because it was emotionally exhausting. But by the end of it, I felt like I had come to a really different place and perspective with him where I could say goodbye to him from I’d like the deepest, heartfelt space I could access and appreciation for who he had been in his best moments. And sent him out in a way that felt really aligned for who I who I want to be in the world and what I want to create. So it was not an easy process. But I am so proud of myself looking back on it and so grateful to have the tenacity to go through this process that was not easy. And lead him in a way that I felt honored the best parts of him.

Catherine A. Wood 15:33
And I really appreciate you even speaking to the three parts of peace, when you talk about that forgiveness journey, I heard the existential piece because it was a value commitment that you had, and their relational piece, and then I hear the embodiment work that you did to be able to move through it.

Rebecca Arnold 15:52
Yeah. Absolutely. I wish I thought about when I was writing the book, cat. Lady to vote. Yeah, what I remember when I called him to say goodbye. I like read him this letter that I had written after I’d done all this forgiveness work. And I like that on my meditation cushion. I had candles lit like I wanted to create a state that felt like even though I was over the phone, it was like, tapped into something much deeper.

Catherine A. Wood 16:27
I mean, I’m really, I’m really struck by that. Because I think for my listeners, and me, like, forgiveness is something that we know we should do. Right. And we know, it’s as much for ourselves as it is for the other person. And I think a lot of us, and I think you and I have chatted about this before, and I think we fall into different camps. But I have had to do a lot of work over the years to connect with anger, to emote anger, to give myself permission to express anger. And I’m just struck by how important of a step that is in doing forgiveness work. And giving ourselves like real full permission to express all the rage, all the anger that we might feel and you know, I shared with you that that really that story of yours, it brought up a member in my family who has caused a lot of harm. And I’ve done a lot of forgiveness work over the years over that relationship. And in reading your book. And and hearing the story this time because I’d heard parts of it before, it struck me that I probably have more anger to release. Even more, even more than I knew I was I have capacity to feel and to name and to emote.

Rebecca Arnold 18:14
Yeah, I think especially for people who are been socialized, it’s women and other marginalized identities like we’ve heard our entire lives, to think about other people to be considerate, to be thoughtful, all of these things. And anger isn’t often given the seat at the table. And it’s a doorway to all of this other transformation that awaits but some will pick up like a plug in the dike. It’s like until you release the anger part of it. It’s hard to get to the goodies on the other side of it. Not that anger isn’t Oh, goody. I mean, I haven’t delight in a little bit of anger, rage walking, all kinds of things this is

Catherine A. Wood 18:49
talking about. Yeah, yeah, I love that. I love how really there’s no value judgment, towards anger or sadness, that they’re both they are extremely valid and they serve a purpose. And as empaths we can so often internalize that they’re bad or wrong, or that we shouldn’t feel that way. Which is really just preventing our own internal peace. Yeah.

Rebecca Arnold 19:21
Yeah, I think if we think about like any emotions, we’re judging as wrong, stifle the range of emotions that we can have access to. And if we want to be fully expressed, we got to have the range like there’s a reason there is the range. And so sometimes when I’m resisting an emotion I like to think about this like I’m blocking an aspect of my life that I would otherwise have access to.

Catherine A. Wood 19:43
It makes me think of guilt, which I feel like is a similarly it’s like a an emotion in a similar it’s like a similar cousin, right? Maybe like second cousins. And you say you write you write about guilt. And I want to read it. You say guilt is the result of socialization, that wrongs you for expressing your needs and creating a life giving relationship with yourself. For the record, taking a stand for yourself in the face of this socialization is countercultural rebellion at its finest. I love I mean, right on. It’s so true, right for, for all those of us who, again, internalize that we shouldn’t ask for what we need, that that we should just squash our own, our own thoughts and feelings and body sensations. We create this felt sense of guilt in our body, which again, prevents this this piece that so many of us are craving, and perhaps now more than ever, because I feel like the the pandemic really illuminated that level of dissatisfaction with ourselves and our own our own experiences of peace, how much was the pandemic connected with your motivation for writing the book.

Rebecca Arnold 21:18
So the book started, from videos that I made in the early stage of the pandemic, to support people with coaching strategies and techniques that I thought could people could use when they were in their houses. And after a couple of months, I realized I transcribed them. And I realized how much content there was that could be really supportive for folks. And it ended up when I looked through the transcripts and all that I realized, so this originally started as a post pandemic guide to reinvention. That was the first iteration of this book. Because I felt like people were going to have already started having conversations about how do I want my life to look when the pandemic is gone. And what I realized as I started really sitting with the material, is that this notion of a rooted peace for those three aspects of peace, are really the connection with connected to holistic success and what people have been searching for for a long time, but haven’t had a name for. And so coming out of the pandemic, I was, like, we need to have start having a new conversation about what holistic success looks like, what people are creating beyond the quick fixes, like what is underneath people wanting a spa vacation, right? Like, no judgement, love the spa vacation, yes. And we don’t have to feel like we’ve escaped from our life. Like, we can have the spa vacation, and also feel like our life is filling us up in all of these various ways. And so it was deeply affected by the pandemic, and the life I hope we all create for ourselves, given this sense of mortality, that I feel like the when we actually connect with what the pandemic was, we are able to connect with that sense of mortality and our need to start now to create the life that we want for ourselves and our families.

Catherine A. Wood 23:06
Yeah, it does feel like it was an access point to reinvention or permission, permission to reinvent. So I want to talk about, I want to talk about these three levels of peace. So we have rooted peace, which I think makes sense, right? Like this idea of creating peace with our body, and relational peace, which also feels like something you can really understand, especially in the wake of the loneliness epidemic that so many of us are experiencing this idea of making peace with ourselves, and peace with others. But I want to I want to elaborate on the second component, this component of existential peace, because I just had so many Aha, I was reading it. And I feel like so many people approach coaching at points in their life when they’re searching for an experience of existential peace, and they may not even know and so what does that mean to you? What does existential piece even mean?

Rebecca Arnold 24:15
So, the central piece I think about first I’m going to give you a metaphor, and then I will explain in more concrete terms. So when you have have an existential piece, it’s like your life feels like puzzle pieces sliding into place. And you’re like, things just fit and feel right. And what I mean by that is, you are doing work, volunteering things with your time that feel like this is the thing I was intended to do. This is the legacy that I want to offer. This is my purpose. It can be I pick up trash on the side of the road and love making the places that my neighbors and I go beautiful It could be running an organization that supports unhoused youth, right, it can run the full gamut. It could be making legacy creating financial financial holdings to support generations going forward, right? It can be anything. But the idea is that it is so aligned for you. It’s almost like your bottom buzzes when you hit on it. So when I coach someone, I get, like, physically hot, I start sweating. It’s almost like, My soul is like, do we swear on here? Or Absolutely. Your soul is like, fuck, yes, this is what I have been waiting for. Right? So that’s the feeling whatever it is, that does that for you. So that’s one piece of it, right? That you’re aligned with your purpose and your legacy. The second piece is that you’re aligned with your values. So I, I cited this, this is so dating me, but I cited this quote from Dirty Dancing, which is nobody puts baby in the corner. That’s how values are right? If you are assuming one of your values, they will let it be No. If for example, the value of yours has integrity, and you’re not honoring it, you will stay up at night worrying about something that felt out of integrity. It lets you know, when you experience existential peace, you’re feeling in alignment with your most important values. And then you’re getting moving, right, you’re like you’re making moves toward living in alignment with your values toward your legacy, and also living in accordance with your most simple strength that come naturally to you. And your gift, the thing that is just completely you that you show up with all the time. And so when those pieces are in place, again, things just feel right. So cat, when you are experiencing existential peace, what do you notice?

Catherine A. Wood 26:51
I feel intimately connected with people. I feel I honestly feel like a conduit for spirit. Like when I’m coaching, and present to existential peace. I feel like I’m a conduit for whatever needs to be communicated through me, it feels like it just flows.

Rebecca Arnold 27:18
I love that. And I bet people feel it too, when they’re in the presence of that with you. Yeah, I love the I think about existential peace, as this idea that if we were all aligned with whatever the things that bring us existential peace, the most pressing challenges that we’re facing in our communities in our society will be solved. Or we’d be moving towards them anyway. Because people wouldn’t be hiding their gifts, they wouldn’t be doing work that isn’t really aligned for them. They wouldn’t be hiding in, in cultures, in work cultures, and in situations where their values weren’t fully expressed. Can you think about the energy wasted with suppression, like suppressing what we really want suppressing alignment with our values, all of that could be used toward incredible ends to solve a really most challenging problems. So

Catherine A. Wood 28:14
I noticed something that’s coming up for me as you’re speaking is this just this idea that many of the folks who come to me for coaching have already reached like a massive level of professional or entrepreneurial success, and oftentimes, the thing that feels missing is not professional. And they may hide behind professional accolades or achievements. And so I guess I’m wondering, is, is your experience of existential peace? That it’s always? Or does it tend towards the professional realm? Or does existential peace present itself in other areas of life?

Rebecca Arnold 29:04
I think it for most of my clients, it’s showing up in a work context, but it doesn’t have to. So if the one, for example, has been longing to be a parent for a long time and feel like that is aligned with their purpose, and how they want to show up and the life they want to have, and that is not in place yet. Or they want to have a relationship that is deeply fulfilling on a soul level, things are going to feel out of place and amiss. So for your folks who’ve achieved a lot of professional success, I would be curious about like, is their job actually lighting them up on a daily level? Or is it the idea of their work? Like is it the status which is fine status is the value of their but is it the is it the status and the like? Things that come along with the Work Or Is it their day to day, that is actually activating them and they’re kind of thrilled there, and it can be great. It can be that They’re thrilled to be at their work, and that it’s totally working for them. And they have this other piece that’s missing. And sometimes I find with my clients who are at the upper echelons of their organization or feel, they like the idea of it, but not the day to day of what their job actually entails. And that’s for them the missing piece along with an outside component. That might not be there, either. But that makes sense.

Catherine A. Wood 30:24
Yeah, it does make sense. I mean, I think I’m trying on different clients experiences to see how that fits. And something that comes to mind is maybe a little more nuanced than what you share it. But it’s like the idea of, I think many of us really connect with our work or the heart of our work. And then we get distracted, or challenged by so many of the, of the administrative or financial or logistical or people management components that we can become really disconnected from what we really love about our work.

Rebecca Arnold 31:08
Yeah. I see that too. There’s like a, I mean, I’ve worked with school superintendents and assistant superintendents, where like, I got into education to be in the classroom. And I haven’t seen kids in weeks. So it’s all become meetings about meetings about kids, but not the kids themselves. And when they start going into the classrooms regularly as a practice, they reconnect with why they’re there in the first place. And they feel way more grounded, committed and motivated. So I do think that that people can lose that in the day to day, absolutely.

Catherine A. Wood 31:53
What part of the book was the hardest for you to write?

Rebecca Arnold 31:59
So there’s a part where I talk about this, like experience of a panic attack, and really sort of the narrative approach for rewiring sort of the narrative of an experience like that of a dark night of the soul. That was tricky, because I was really writing in great detail about that experience. And I think because I’m so embedded embodied by nature, and visual, I can put myself back in a moment very easily. And so I had to do some work on as I was doing that part on like, grounding, breathing, writing a little bit, taking a break, doing other other exercises in the book, coming back to it, because it is these experiences that are kind of stuck in us in our in our consciousness, take a lot of energy to work through. And so that was that section, and it took me the longest to really work through, because I was still doing some residual work on it as I was writing it. And so I kept working on that section until I felt like the residual work had faded to the degree I needed it to, it’s never going to be completely gone. But it felt like there was a lot of healing in the writing itself. As, as was the writing about my dad, and the whole experience was similar, envisioning it, experiencing it somatically. So there was just a lot of healing baked in to the process of writing this book, which I really appreciate it. Because my hope is that that’s imbued throughout that that kind of healing was available, like I walked up to both of my lived experiences and also in the writing of it.

Catherine A. Wood 33:41
I love that example of the that being triggered on the stage because I feel like you really speak to the embodiment of what rooted peace looks like in your day to day life, this idea of not stepping over your own somatic response. And right, like not trying to muscle through or intellectualize yourself out of feeling a certain way. And and I just love how you share that because I think so many of us, we don’t stop, we don’t slow down when we’re having a reaction or a response or feeling too much we just push through. And that. I mean, I certainly know that’s been my default. You know, I used to have this boss when I lived in Santo Domingo. He used to say Katya tourism. Una maquina de mohair, like cat you are a woman machine. And it was such an accolade for me like this idea that I could just push my way through anything. So much so that I got bronchitis and was out of work on bed rest for three weeks. And it’s, it’s something that so many of us have to learn this idea of attuning to our body and trusting the messaging that our body’s telling us. And so I’m wondering what your journey, what your personal journey was to become so attuned to your body’s needs, because it feels like it just, it’s so naturally integrated at this point.

Rebecca Arnold 35:41
Yes, it has not always been so I, it’s really interesting, because the way when I was young, like in early high school, a lot of my anxiety manifests the automatically. So I wouldn’t realize that I was anxious, but I had a horrible stomach ache. And I, like went through the whole gi diagnostic gauntlet, and nothing was wrong. And it took a long time for people to pick up that it was like anxiety and depression, actually, that was causing that. And I feel like this is this integration piece is the upside of that somatization. Like, I think that’s a natural default and very attune internally. And so when things are going too fast, or there’s too much stress and things are out of out of alignment. I feel it very quickly, internally. And now know what to do with that. When I was younger, I didn’t know what to do with it, it just felt very much out of control. But now I feel like it’s a superpower. Because in my coaching, I’m very connected to what my client is speaking what’s happening internally. And even very small nuances of that, that that I can reflect back and ask my client if they’re noticing anything like that, or if there’s anything happening for them in that area. And so it’s been a journey of sort of like toggling between paying too much attention, Politico, too much attention to my physical sensations and having them take me over to kind of dialing it down to a degree that I can then start to parse out and understand and work with. And so I think Reiki has been a huge help in doing that, like my own Reiki practice, to sort of look at the connection between physical sensation, energy and intuition. And doing yoga has supported that doing meditation has supported that, and seeing the impact, like sort of normalizing that it’s okay to have these sensations and reflect them in coaching has helped me recognize the power of them instead of feeling that that’s a problem to be solved or something like that.

Catherine A. Wood 37:54
Yeah, I love how they they occur like light bulbs, like brass like light bulbs, for your mind to catch up with your body.

38:07
Yeah, totally.

Catherine A. Wood 38:10
So I mean, I’m conversely I’m imagining that embodiment. And rooted piece can really support in, in growth, and locking in change. And so I’m wondering what your experience of that is.

Rebecca Arnold 38:31
Yeah, so this is one of my very favorite things about embodiment, because I worked with superbright clients who are want to parse out all the mindset and everything, which is glorious, love that. And what I often find is some very small, somatic practicing or experiencing something immediately locks it in. So let’s do an example for your listeners. If that works, beautiful. Just list three things you feel good about having accomplished. Right? It might be in a word you got it might be a position you have, it might be a moment as a parent, it could be a moment on the stage anything. Right? Athletic accomplishment. This take a moment in Jacksonville. Okay, cat, what’s one of yours? something you’re proud of

Catherine A. Wood 39:22
my marriage? Great.

Rebecca Arnold 39:25
Okay, so we can totally be like, awesome, great marriage. Now. What I want to invite you to do is like, feel in your body, allow your body to occupy that pride in your marriage. So if you hold your body in a way that shows your pride in your marriage, how would you do that?

Catherine A. Wood 39:48
I feel my eyes sparkling and the corners of my lips going up.

Rebecca Arnold 39:55
Great. And I saw your chapstick fan a little bit you sat back and settled They’ll hire. And I see your face getting a little like delightfully rosy.

Catherine A. Wood 40:06
That’s the Irish, Rosie show. Rebecca.

Rebecca Arnold 40:09
Are you Are you alright? Well, so if we think about the intellectual, like, I’m proud of my marriage. That’s great. And if we combine it with, I’m proud of my marriage in the somatic sense, right, you’re sitting upright, your mouth is turned up, you have a sparkle in your eyes. And I asked you later today, to think about your pride in your marriage, you would likely start to like your face would start to do the thing it did when he thought about how proud you were of your marriage. It’s like an immediate access point to it. So if I’m working with a client who’s feeling like I’m feeling, I’m feeling really rundown at work, and they start to kind of hunched over and they start to hang their head down, well reflect on that, okay, now do the opposite. Sit up, bounce in your chair a little bit, right, raise your head, they’ll be like, Oh, feeling actually kind of good right now. Nothing changed in their mindset, they just changed their physical posture. So if you’re stuck at work, and you want to access a little more energy, this bounce in your seat, hold your head upright, and decide what you want to do. So it’s like a very quick way to change your current state into the state that you want it to be. And to lock in some changes that you’re working on in your mindset.

Catherine A. Wood 41:27
What a fun hack.

Rebecca Arnold 41:31
To totally, my clients are often like, hold on, how could never no one ever told me this before?

Catherine A. Wood 41:37
I can absolutely Imagine that. Well, as we’re, as we’re nearing the end, I mean, I’m taking so many gems from from your book. And I’m really excited for our listeners to tune in. And we’ll, of course, include the links where they can buy a copy in the show notes. But I’m curious if there’s a if there’s a tool from your book, that that applies to being a prosperous Empath, if there’s really a tool or exercise that is really supported you in thriving as an empath.

Rebecca Arnold 42:19
So there’s a sector that on clearing energetic crud that I think is really important, because as empaths, we are like, charcoal of society. That’s how I think about it. We’re constantly clearing other people’s crap, which is a delightful service, however unpaid. And we often don’t have any training or capacity and how you get rid of it, right? So you’re walking around just constantly absorbing all this stuff. So it’s really important to know how what is your way of getting rid of that? It could be the rage walk, which is one of my favorites. It could be shaking, right? A lot, shaking out your head, shaking out your arms allow your whole body to move. It could be breath, practice, whatever it is that works for you, but that that part walks you through some different options. And I think as an empath, it is really a vital part of self care to figure out how to clear energetic crud. So that’s the thing that I would say is important. Whatever is your strategy.

Catherine A. Wood 43:20
Gorgeous. Yeah, I hear you speaking to energetic boundaries. How do we put on our Teflon?

Rebecca Arnold 43:26
Yep. And then for the bits that sneak through the cracks? How do you flick them off and get rid of sitting in your belly all day?

Catherine A. Wood 43:38
Awesome. Love it. Rebecca, I’m so excited for your book to come to the world. I’m so honored to have been a part of your journey and congratulations on birthing such a beautiful creative expression of you.

Rebecca Arnold 43:55
Thank you. I’m so excited for people to have this host of tools that support them along the way.