Finding Success Hosting Summits as a HSP with Rose Cox

Catherine A. Wood  00:02

Hello, and welcome back everyone to another episode of the prosperous Empath podcast. I am so thrilled to have here today. My guest, Rose Cox, who is joining us from Australia. And I met rose last year when I participated on her Summit. And I’m excited to share more with you all today about how rose run summits because I think it’s absolutely masterful. But before we jump in rose, thank you so much for being here. I’d love for you to share a little bit about who you are and your business.

Rose Cox  00:40

Oh, thanks, Catherine. It’s so lovely to be here. Thank you for inviting me to be on your wonderful new podcast. So yeah, as you said, I’m in Australia. I just have to point out I’m from New Zealand, though I do live in Australia, but I’m a kiwi through and through. I am I’m a transformational coach and a business strategist. And my background is actually I had a web development business for about 20 years before I retrained. And I actually initially retrained to be a rapid transformational therapist and clinical hypnotherapist and then I later train to become a coach. I’ve done a couple of coaching certifications. And so I’ve blended everything from my web development, business and my technology background, with the hypnotherapy with the coaching, and I bring it all together into what I’ve recently created, which is the HSP business school. And I work with highly sensitive people empaths and introverts and I help them to, to really scale their businesses in a way that is aligned with with our soul with the way that we are as sensitives and empaths.

Catherine A. Wood  02:03

I love that. And you know, I always enjoy receiving your newsletters. And I think we follow each other on social but one of the things I appreciate is how much you’ve normalized the experience of being a sensitive and business. What does that mean to you? Well, I

Rose Cox  02:25

only discovered I was highly sensitive last year. And when when I discovered it was like a light bulb moment. For me, it was such a revelation. I always felt that I was a bit different to other business owners, I felt that I wasn’t doing things the right way I was being taught different ways of doing things. And it just didn’t work for me. So when I found out I was highly sensitive, it just it really made me feel validated. And it made me think, oh, you know, I can actually do things my way. And it works. It actually works my way. So I guess what that means being highly sensitive and business means that I can actually give myself permission to run my business the way I want to set my working hours to set my boundaries of what I what I’ll say yes to what I’ll say no to and yes, so many things. And I’m actually taking a month off over Christmas, which I’m very excited about. And even though I’ve had my own business for probably close to 25 years, I’m thinking with my different businesses. I’ve never actually taken this much time off just for me and it feels so nice, so yummy. And I’m very excited about my month off.

Catherine A. Wood  03:49

That sounds delicious. I’m taking three weeks off, but a month sounds even more luxurious. And I really hear the peace about permission. The idea of embracing being a highly sensitive entrepreneur has looked like giving yourself permission to build business on your own terms. I’m curious, what changes that what other changes that’s allowed you to make and how you run your business.

Rose Cox  04:20

Um, so I’ve I guess things like marketing has changed a bit. I used to think there was only one way to do marketing and which was to get on camera and be out there and be out there taking photos and sort of letting everyone know what you’re doing and, and I just, I don’t really like that sort of thing. I mean, I’m happy to share a few things. I share my morning walk. Not every day. I used to do it every day, but I’ve even stepped back from that. It’s just I guess it’s just made me really, really realize that I can I build my business on my own terms. And I don’t have to have lots of lots of activity going on all the time. I guess I’ve always, even though I have had my own businesses for a long time, I still had that mentality of working in a nine to five job, or in a corporate job, which I used to do. Feeling that I had to work the eight hours a day, and you know, half an hour for lunch and finish at five or whatever, or sometimes not even finish at five, but work through the night, which I used to do as well. I think the permission that’s given me with my businesses that I might only want to work two hours a day, I might want to go to the beach early, because it’s really hot here. Or I can actually just give myself permission to work on my terms.

Catherine A. Wood  05:51

I, I love that reminder that we get to define our business in our life on our own terms. And it’s an iterative process, like where I noticed that I’m constantly discovering places and areas in life, where I have to give myself more permission where I have to take back ownership, oh, wow, I get I can build it on my own terms here. And here. And here, too. It’s like a, it’s like a discovery. Because we’re so conditioned in the way we operate and, and show up in business and life and just so many different ways.

Rose Cox  06:29

Yeah, that’s so true. And something else I know, I was just walking home from yoga this morning. And I was thinking, I actually spend four to five hours every morning before I start work. And it seems like such a luxury but my exercise my morning exercise and my mindset work is so important to me. And if I don’t have that four or five hours, I mean, I do get up at five. So that helps to, to not actually save to start work at one in the afternoon. I normally started about 10 o’clock. But I think having that I know that’s not common in the corporate world. But having that sort of permission that yeah, this is the way around my business. And it just sets me up for the day. And it makes Yeah, it really does set me up for the day makes me feel good makes me feel motivated and less, I guess less overwhelmed with anything that might come my way during the day.

Catherine A. Wood  07:32

You and I share that ritual about a morning routine having just a delicious, exquisite morning routine. I think my readers are always really inspired by others morning routines. Would you like to share yours?

Rose Cox  07:45

Yes, sure. So yeah, normally get up at five I, I have a bit of an Ayurvedic background. I’ve been following Ayurveda for many years. So I do some practices which involve oil pulling, which is swelling, sesame, black sesame oil, and your mouth. And I sometimes do Nitti depending which is the nasal ad. Yes, yeah. And I have an ever Yanga, which is a self massage. I normally do that before my shower, though. And I do meditation. And then I walk, I generally walk to yoga, which is about a half hour walk each way. And the yoga class is an hour. If I don’t have yoga that day, then I genuinely have a one hour walk. And then I do yoga at home. I sometimes do some Pilates, I’ve got my own reformer. And I sometimes do a bit of weight training as well. And then when I’ve done my exercise, I’ll have my shower and the NBN go which is the self massage with the black sesame oil. And then I sit down and I do my gratitude. I write in my gratitude journal, and then I write a journal. I speak to the universe. I asked my angels question and I answer back or they answered the back. Wow. And then I read I either read a personal development book or I do like an online video for about half an hour. And then that normally takes me to around nine 930. And yeah, and then I might have some breakfast, but I do intermittent fasting as well. So I often don’t actually have breakfast till about 11 o’clock.

Catherine A. Wood  09:44

Hmm. I love hearing that you write to your angels. I think we chatted about this before that I write a letter to God. And then I write back to myself from the divine part of me that always knows already knows the end answers. And I’ve never met someone else who had a similar practice. So I love that about you and that we share that.

Rose Cox  10:06

Yeah, I’ve been doing that for such a long time. And it’s amazing what, what comes out. And I love to read them back to you, Rachel spec Eva.

Catherine A. Wood  10:16

Absolutely. And I highlight points, because often, that’s where I get my most clear downloads my most profound intuitions that are on the yoga mat or while meditating. But it’s just it’s such clear guidance for me.

Rose Cox  10:32

Yeah, it’s amazing, isn’t it? Yeah,

Catherine A. Wood  10:35

it is. It’s exquisite. And you know, I know that you don’t have children. Is that correct?

Rose Cox  10:39

That’s correct. So I have two cats. Yes. And

Catherine A. Wood  10:43

I have two dogs, and I so don’t have children yet. So I know, it’s certainly a point of privilege that we as women can take that much luxurious time in the morning. But, you know, I think the same is true for I work with lots of clients who are moms, and maybe it’s not first thing in the morning, but they also prioritize that time to generate themselves and their sense of personal peace. Maybe it’s mid morning, or maybe it’s they get up an hour before the kids. But I think it makes so much of a difference.

Rose Cox  11:16

Definitely. And I should point out that it didn’t. This written didn’t used to be so long. I did elongated. I have elongated it over the years. So I probably started with an hour or an hour and a half. And it’s just got longer as I guess, as my business has grown as well, as I’ve, yeah, yeah, definitely is the income has increased, it’s been easier to actually take that time to do that. So I don’t think it’s something you know, I wouldn’t recommend someone just starting out. But yeah, you can five hours every morning before you start. I think it’s something that you need to work up to.

Catherine A. Wood  11:56

Totally. And you also used a word, which I think is so important. You said sometimes you sometimes do Pilates, you sometimes go to yoga, and I hear that there’s just permission to adapt to feel what your body needs in the morning. It’s not necessarily kind of this rule oriented. Rituals. Right? Does that feel to you?

Rose Cox  12:21

Yeah, definitely. And I didn’t always used to be like that. So I’ve really had to learn that No, I don’t have to do Pilates every day. I don’t have to do yoga every day. So it’s yeah, I really liked that. You pick that up? kibitz? Some? Yeah, that’s so true. And I’m glad that I got out of that rigidity. Because I can Yeah, I can just be such a such a major on myself sometimes and then beat myself up at the end of the day. If I haven’t ticked off everything.

Catherine A. Wood  12:53

Absolutely same. And I almost for me, and I’d be curious to hear for you. But for me, it was that willingness to be flexible in my morning routine, and in my habits, that allowed me to be come consistent in forming that morning routine from the beginning. Because when I started, it was so much a competition with myself to do everything I set out to do. And I was so rigid. And when I allowed it to be adaptive to be more attuned to, you know, what my body was needing or what I, I felt that I wanted to prioritize. It allowed me to build that muscle of consistency

Rose Cox  13:35

was so similar that just everything you said, does so.

Catherine A. Wood  13:41

Yeah, right. I love that. Well, let’s, let’s shift gears, because one of the things that I I mean, I think I first fell in love with you when you interviewed me on your Summit, because you were a masterful interviewer. And I know that you and I share this that we love interviewing people on our podcasts, and the solo episodes are still a bone of contention for both of us to sing. But I have it that hosting summits it is such a intensive time. time commitment. So and you’re so effortless at it. So what has supported you in in thriving in this in this part of your business?

Rose Cox  14:38

Hmm. Well, thank you. Thank you very much for your kind words about I mean, to Lagos, it’s so kind. Thank you. I think so I’ve done three summits now. And the first summit that I did was I would say it was very difficult. Um, I suffered burnout and overwhelm in the middle of it. It was a two week Summit. And I was following the program and it was against the way that I am. As far as well, I’ll give you the example. So the example was, first of all, it was two weeks, which was a long time. It’s not that I interviewed people live, I did all the interviews pre recorded, which I’ve done for almost Summit. But one of the stipulations was that we had to get speakers who had an email list of at least 5000 people, and they had to email the list twice, do solo emails and three, I think it was three or four social media. And I found that really a key asking people the list size for one and stipulating that if it wasn’t big enough, they couldn’t be on my summer. It just went actually went against everything. And, and then I had to follow people up in the middle of the summit, who weren’t, people weren’t promoting. I had about four of three or four of the speakers just ghosted me. I’ve never heard back from them to this day, that they didn’t do any promotion. And they didn’t do Yeah. So they I found that really, really difficult. So when I did my next two summits, well, I actually discovered I was an HSP, in the middle of this burnout and overwhelm, and I was listening to a podcast. And so I kind of struggled over the finish line in the second week. And then that was, I think it was last May or May 2021. And then I did a second summit in December. And so it’s actually a year ago, it was a year. Today, I actually just got a reminder on. I think it was on Strava, saying the late the summit begins. So it was the seventh of December, which is today in Australia. But it was an HSP Summit. I called it the HSP entrepreneur Summit. And I didn’t stipulate an email list. I didn’t. I mean, I asked the size, but it was an optional, gave a ballpark it was an optional field in the form for the speakers. But I didn’t have a stipulation. Because to be honest, I want to I wanted to give everyone a chance, like if someone’s a new, a new coach or a new entrepreneur, how are they going to get to speak on a summit if they don’t have the list size? And really, and also the promoting? I thought, if people want to promote, I want them to want to print them out. I don’t want to force them. So that was the huge that was yeah, that was a huge difference with the two summits, I think the other. The other big difference. And then I did a third summit, I did another summit this year, which is the one I met you it. And

Catherine A. Wood  18:05

I’d love to pause you there. Yes, there was something that you did in your, in your organization of the summit, because I remember that when we were promoting when we were in the promotion phase, and I hadn’t yet shared with my list, you were tracking the data. And you sent me an email saying, hey, cat, I noticed you didn’t share with your list. I just wanted to make sure you had all of the links. And here they are, if you’d like to support the summit, and there was so much permission in your email. It was such an email of generosity and positive intent. That it it actually made me want to go out and share about the summit with all of my audience. And I was so glad I did because several set multiple people in my community shared, but it was because of this very thing you’re talking about that you truly embodied giving your summit guests permission to participate to promote if they wanted to.

Rose Cox  19:10

Yeah, yeah. Thank you. Thank you for sharing that. Yeah. And I actually did do that on my first summit. To be honest, that’s the way I emailed people. Because that’s how I am I couldn’t I couldn’t email them the way that we were taught to in this program. I just thought I had to be me. And the other thing in the other two summits that I did, I did an affiliate program, which wasn’t recommended as part of this program, but I branched out on my own and I thought no, I want to, I want to offer an affiliate fee as well. So a lot of my speakers in some really good money. I think the top affiliate earner I think she it was close to $1,000 that she earned from a full Yep, phase and the first summit. So it was so nice to actually share the the income and this was, you know, just for the VIP not not everyone upgraded obviously. But for people who wanted to upgrade to the VIP pass that meant that they got lifetime access or not lifetime. I don’t know whose lifetime but you know, ongoing access so they could depend on out and if they couldn’t make all of the live speeches or interviews?

Catherine A. Wood  20:32

Can we can we talk about the moment that you realized when you were facilitating the summit that you were an HSP, and what that moment was like for you?

Rose Cox  20:43

Oh, gosh. So I’d already done the interviews. So I had, I didn’t have any interviews after that. But the moment I was out walking, I was listening to a podcast. And it was just this massive realization. And I just felt actually like a sense of calm, even though I still had another week of the, I guess the organizing, there was still a lot of organizing, even though I’ve done the interviews, these daily emails, and I think I was actually doing a couple of Facebook lives as well, with the speakers in my Facebook group. And I just, I just felt the the sense of calm, it felt amazing. And even though I felt all this overwhelm, and burnout and everything, I just thought, I’m just going to, because I’d already set all the systems up, I had everything sort of going and I think maybe I cancelled one of the Facebook Lives. Because I gave myself permission, I thought I don’t have to do if I don’t want to. And it was you, I would say a sense of calm. And

Catherine A. Wood  21:56

for me, I had my epiphany when I read Elaine Aaron’s the highly sensitive person. And it was such an epiphany, like the idea of how many times throughout my whole life, people have said, cat stop being so sensitive. And getting to reframe that for myself. And in starting to have more grace and compassion for myself when I was feeling sensitive. And also having more awareness of when I was feeling sensitive, and not making that wrong, or not making that kind of a critique of myself was life changing. And then similarly, with my husband, he’s also sensitive, although he probably wouldn’t admit it. And I, I sometimes in my head, you know, I’m like, Ah, stop being so sensitive. And I’ve also started reframing that for myself, even if it’s my own internal dialogue with myself just starting to appreciate when I am noticing others sensitivity, because it is such a deeply ingrained value judgment against being sensitive.

Rose Cox  23:05

Yeah, it was, isn’t it? And I, I know exactly what you mean, I started noticing. As soon as I discovered, I started noticing family members and friends who said, Arthur, that is same, and I was able to share it with them. And it just made a huge difference for them as well. So one of them was actually mine, my nephew in New Zealand, and I shared with his mum and dad, and they were just so curious about it. And they’ve dived into it now and his mom is actually highly sensitive to we’ve talked about it. So yeah, being able to share it with so many people has, I just think it’s amazing, because I wish I’d found out a lot sooner. Yeah, to find out and my fifth days was a bit of a shame. If I’d known in my 20s It would have been a lot easier, I think growing up or even teens, but but I’m just glad that I found out and so now I’m on a mission to spread the word.

Catherine A. Wood  24:10

What are some of your favorite gifts of being an HSP?

Rose Cox  24:17

I think the intuition is a big one. And that’s not always something that I gave myself credit for i I’ve always had that an unknowing and that you know that voice and I get visions as well. I get a lot of clairvoyance. And I used to push it aside because I didn’t think it was I just thought it was my own self talk or Yeah, I didn’t actually listen to it. So there has been a big one for me and I’ve really learned to hone that as well. The other thing I love i I’ve always noticed little details everywhere. Like I’ll go to someone’s house To house and say, Oh, that’s a new cushion. And no one not many people notice that well, people around me don’t notice things. Or if I’m out walking, I’ll notice if someone’s planted a new shrub outside of the garden, you know, things like that. And I love noticing little things like that. And my brother actually used to call me nosy Rosie. But I think it’s just that I’m Well, for one. I’m curious. Curiosity is another wonderful gift of ours. But I’m just I just noticed, I noticed all these things. Yeah. There’s so many clips, actually, I’m just thinking of more thinking of because there’s so many. That’s a wonderful trait.

Catherine A. Wood  25:44

That was the one I was gonna mention being highly conscientious, because I notice everything in how in my, in my, in my experience of being conscientious, and I am often surprised when I don’t receive that same treatment from other people. And I’ve had to do a lot of work over the years, and realizing that just because I am highly conscientious with folks, it doesn’t mean that other people share that quality, that value that way of being and that that’s okay. And I shouldn’t expect that.

Rose Cox  26:17

Yeah, it’s interesting, isn’t it? And that, I guess it makes you what makes me really want to be around other highly sensitive people, because I know how conscientious we are. We’re very kind hearted and yeah,

Catherine A. Wood  26:30

I totally Absolutely. How, how, what how did being HSP support you in hosting your summits?

Rose Cox  26:42

I think when you mentioned that interview, I I didn’t even realize I had good interview skills. But we knew mentioned that. And I know you mentioned that in a previous talk that we did. And I think it’s because being an HSP we’re really good listeners. And I love I actually love to listen to people. I remember when I was I used to work in corporate, I hated speaking up in meetings, I would be the little medicine, the corner because I hated talking. But I love listening. And I love picking up on the subtle, you know, the body language and unspoken things. So, oh yeah, I would say, being able to interview people, um, pulling out the right things to say and knowing what would also help the listeners, I think that’s something that I try to do on my podcast as well. I try to ask questions that I know will be helpful for people listening or people watching the summit.

Catherine A. Wood  27:51

I can appreciate that. I mean, everything that I was doing that just as you were talking now, I was thinking about what what would be helpful for most to share. I and I and I, I something came to me like I would love to know, for other people who are discerning that they’re now HSPs or, you know, wish that they had known this about themselves years decades ago, like what, what tips or what advice would you offer them?

Rose Cox  28:27

That’s a it’s a good question. I guess. Just be really grateful that you’ve discovered it now. And, and that’s what i i You know, I said before, I wish I’d found out when I was younger, but I think just being grateful that I know now and and I also I really dived until I read all of Elaine Aaron’s books and other books that I could find everything I could get my hands on, I just wanted to find out as much as I could about the trait and find out how how we could thrive especially in our businesses, because I love I love blending the two I love actually blending the business with the HSP. Because I really believe as an HSP we’ve got so many gifts to offer the world. And yet a lot of us find it hard to get out there and share our message and share our what we want to do. We don’t really like selling particularly, or marketing ourselves. And I don’t want to sort of say this about everybody but I know it can be challenging for many highly sensitives to to get out there and market themselves and sell and ask for the sale. And I think that’s such a shame because there are wonderful ways that we can market ourselves and attract the right people to us. And again, that’s one of my missions fishy with the HSP business school. It’s to help other highly sensitive entrepreneurs is to, to really get out there and really find their people find their niche in the market so they can help other people because I just I really believe that we need to be out there, especially in the world today, I think we need to be in places of leadership. And yeah, I think we’re needed we there are empathic side as well, I think there’s too many empathic people in the world and the leadership roles that if I can help just one or two people get out there more than my work has done.

Catherine A. Wood  30:34

I think that we share those values. That was certainly why I launched this podcast because I think that you know, empaths and highly sensitive, they we are so mission oriented, we’re so purpose driven, we so believe in the causes that we support. And and the reason why we’re in business. And, you know, if we can put more wealth and economic prosperity in the hands of those conscientious business folks, Will, we’re the type of business owners who redistribute our money and are intentional about our charitable givings and the causes that we support.

Rose Cox  31:13

So true. Yeah, I love that I love your mission kit. I really do.

Catherine A. Wood  31:21

I know that I know that we share it. Well, I’m curious. I gosh, I feel like I could talk with you all day. But I think I’d love to share just perhaps any, any tips or tricks that you want? My audience, our shared audience to know about thriving as highly sensitives? And empaths, particularly in the times that we’re in right now?

Rose Cox  31:58

Is do you mean, around the business sense? Or just in general?

Catherine A. Wood  32:03

I mean, it could be either we’re going to be this post, this podcast will be airing just in the start of the new year. Okay. Yeah. And I think we’re, we’re ending a particularly heavy energetic year.

Rose Cox  32:16

Yeah. Yeah. I would say, I guess this probably covers both business and general. But I think finding, finding what you really want to do and what you’re really passionate about, and putting your energies into that, and just letting go of other things, especially things that either you think you should be doing, or people think other people think you should be doing. But really think about what you want to do and what your mission is, I think having a mission that you are fully behind really helps in all areas of your life.

Catherine A. Wood  32:57

I, I talk about values a lot. And the idea that just checking in whether the decisions I’m making are aligned with my values, because it’s such a clear, it’s such a clear answer, you know, yes, it’s an easy place to kind of assess and choose and, and pivot and just redirect the decisions we make. And also making sure that we’re in alignment with our path, our vision, our mission, our values, rather than someone else’s, or, you know, someone else’s guidance or expertise that is louder or more extroverted or more boisterous than our own.

Rose Cox  33:37

Yeah, absolutely. I think that’s it is common, because part of a lot of us are people pleasers. So, we, we want to make other people happy. And if someone thinks we should be doing this, then we’ll often do it, even if it’s not something we’re fully behind or aligned on.

Catherine A. Wood  33:57

And I think also, you know, one of the pitfalls I’ve noticed for me of being highly conscientious is that I’m constantly questioning myself questioning my expertise, questioning my thought leadership, questioning, my my felt sense, which is wonderful because I’m always evolving and being reflective. But I also noticed that I often undermine my opinion to someone else’s who’s louder, more, more clearer and more kind of a few Civ about what they think or believe. And I often have to remind myself, just because my intuition is quieter, or a little slower to be distinguished for me than someone else’s, it doesn’t mean it’s less true or less real for me or what I believe.

Rose Cox  34:55

I love that. It’s so it is so important to put ourselves first and it’s not easy to, it’s really not easy to.

Catherine A. Wood  35:04

Yeah, it’s not. But back to the morning ritual that is certainly a structure that I know supports both you and me in doing so. Yeah, definitely. Rose, this has been such a delight as I knew it would be. And I’d love to end my episode The way I do with all my guests, which is to ask you what has supported you and becoming a prosperous empath?

Rose Cox  35:29

I love this question. So I didn’t ever think about it. When I was walking this morning because I was listening to one of your recent episodes, and I knew you were going to ask me this question. I think the first thing that came to mind really was asking for help. Like I’ve never been very good at asking for support or asking for help. I’ve always thought I could do everything myself. I’m independent and but recently, in the last 12 months, I have asked for help even if it’s just asking my husband for help with something or really like leaning more on support from my coach or from colleagues if if I need support or help with something. Even outsourcing some words on my podcast, I’ve been outsourcing as well. So yeah, asking for help. That’s been a big thing. So I hope that I hope it is a good answer.

Catherine A. Wood  36:36

It’s brilliant. I could not agree more. Joy. Thank you so much. We will share your website about the HSP business school and your podcast for sure in our show notes and always enjoy being with

Rose Cox  36:48

you. Know, thank you so much. Kitt. always lovely to talk to you too.