Embracing Spaciousness: The Transformative Power of Slowing Down

Catherine A. Wood  00:00

Catherine A. Wood 00:00
Hello, hello. Welcome back to the prosperous Empath cat here this week, we’re continuing on in the mini series around some of the foundational conversations I tend to have with most, if not all, of my clients who identify as ambitious empaths, and they’re ones that I’ve done so much internal work on myself, and today’s topic is another powerful one, and it is about slowing down and carving out more spaciousness. And really like, if we don’t, what are the consequences of living in this 24/7 world? And I this is a conversation I have a lot with clients and friends, and it can be really hard, like slowing down can be super tricky, you know, because when things are going well, we naturally want to lean in. We want to ride that wave, which is the total opposite of slowing down, and when things aren’t going well, and slowing down may feel even more necessary. It can also be really challenging, because we might feel undeserving or like we can’t or we don’t have enough time to slow down. We need to fix or solve for what’s not working. There’s this sense of scarcity and false urgency that we need to move more quickly when, in reality, slowing down can provide that connection to our own intuition and to our own creative problem solving, which might unearth new possibilities and new opportunities that we hadn’t previously considered. But here’s the thing, we don’t have unlimited energy. And I have personally experienced that the consequence of believing that farce like one too many times. I mean, if you’ve been here a while, you know, I’ve shared about my own journey with workaholism early on in my business, and those, just those winters where I was on antibiotic, antibiotics seemingly non stop for sinus infections, and I just didn’t understand why I kept getting sick when I was, of course, burning the candle at both ends, working seven days a week and trying to make my numbers so I could quit my nine to five or prior to that, when I lived in the Dominican Republic, and I was out of work for three weeks on forced bed rest due to acute bronchitis, while I was finishing up my MBA Capstone and traveling around the whole island, monitoring these community Run ecotourism startup grants that I was directly responsible for, and these were amazing opportunities and amazing invigorating times in my life and in my career, and there was no spaciousness, there was no room in my schedule to integrate the excitement I was experiencing, but also to maintain and protect my energy. Now here’s the thing about forcing our bodies into submission is that there’s often many fruits of playing that game, and there can be very real benefits of operating in this fashion in business. And I think that for early entrepreneurs, this can be a necessary season of business where you’re activated and workaholic tendencies and tenacities for reaching goals can really support you. It was certainly the case for me, and I’ve seen it time and time again with clients that that way, that default way of creating and achieving goals. It’s effective, but at some point we get to a place where we realize that our bodies, our businesses and our relationships will force us to slow down if we’re not willing to take action and course correct on our own. I think these hard won life lessons can come in many different ways for some of the clients that I’ve worked with over the years, clients of distinguished illnesses, well being breakdowns, chronic overwhelm or fatigue or money evading them. Client contracts ending or space in their calendars being created, seemingly on their behalf. Half when they were unwilling to claim that space and to implement those boundaries on their own. And I get it like it’s not easy to slow down. It is not easy to live and operate in your business fundamentally differently when we are surrounded by others operating on this 24/7 schedule. It’s not easy to slow down and live in your own terms when you don’t have a model for someone else who has done it or is doing it well. And it’s totally not easy to slow down and run your business differently when things are going exceedingly well and opportunities keep getting bigger and brighter and shinier. But what I’ve come to appreciate about transformation and fundamental change is that it can often be reached from one or two one of but what I’ve come to appreciate about fundamental change or transformation is that it can often be reached in one of two paths. And I think Dr Michael Beckwith says this best when he said the pain pushes until the vision pulls. So essentially, this fundamental change can occur when the consequences of continuing to operate in the same fashion become too great. So when the consequences of you getting continually sick or me having continual sinus infections or time scarcity, or being on bed rest, when the consequences of that become too great, or when, when The consequences of that become too great and you are pushed forward, or you’re compelled to make a different choice, or when the future possibility of what your life and business could become pulls you forward. Now I really appreciate this wisdom, because it feels really ancient, and I think that there’s so many there’s so many different modalities that talk about this distinction in different ways, right? Like yogis say, root down to rise up. I totally remember when my Kundalini yoga instructor would remind us to root down in order to rise up. And similarly, when meditators say ground down to rise up. And in my line of work as ontological coaches, we often say slow down to speed up. So I just want to invite you to consider that i Hey, Haley, I Want to scratch that and start it over. I Yeah, something I really appreciate about being a conscious business owner is that there are so many bodies of work that talk about this concept of slowing down, and they use similar but different language, right, like yogis say root down to rise up, and meditators say ground down to rise up. I certainly remember that in my Kundalini yoga teacher training, right, like ground down to rise up, and in my coach training, they would often say to us, slow down to speed up. And I think that that can be just so inherently challenging and confronting for us for so many reasons, both conscious ones and unconscious ones. I think for many of us, some of the unconscious or subconscious reasons that it can be so hard to give ourselves permission to slow down is because I. It is because we’ve connected our sense of identity and self with our achievements or what we can do, what we can produce, what we can create, for so long and so naturally the consequence of slowing down would have cost you. It certainly used to cost me that sense of worthiness, right? If our only access point to feeling good or good enough about ourselves revolves around what we accomplish, what we check off our to do list, who we help, what we add to our resume, then the possibility of slowing down would very naturally feel incredibly risky. I Okay. So how do we transform that inherent So, how do we transform that deeply subconscious resistance to slow down in order to speed up. I think that learning how to I believe that learning how to slow down in order to speedy up to speedy up. I believe that learning how to slow down in order to speed up is a fundamental life lesson that we all need to learn as prosperous empaths, I think it requires a deep, healthy sense of self compassion and grace for yourself as you lean into this practice. And there are countless well being practices and invitations to be more gentle with yourself than I think, can really support this journey, such as meditation or a Sacred morning routine i So yeah, Haley, I want to kind of remove that whole section and back it up a little. So how do we do this? Like, how do we cultivate more spaciousness in our lives, both in our own mental capacity to create space, as well as in our schedules? And I still remember an insight my my own coach shared with me a couple years ago when I was in a conversation around carving out more spaciousness in my schedule, and she said that this is why people become workaholics, because they don’t want to deal with what they find in the space. And those words have stuck with me ever since then, because I think it’s so true. I think we’re afraid of finding what’s in the space, when we honor our boundaries around our schedule, when we don’t overbook ourselves, when we create white space on purpose, when we take vacations and leave work at home. I personally used to avoid spaciousness from this deep seated need to prove my worthiness to contribute, to be productive, all in order to earn the love and appreciation and acceptance from other people at the expense of accepting myself. I do really kind of believe that many of our incapacity. To cultivate and curate a healthy sense of spaciousness in life, in our own lives, stems from this void of just cherishing and nourishing and prioritizing ourselves. I think this is work that we so deeply need to do as a collective. So if you find yourself racing as we race towards the end of summer and the beginning of the school year and fall, if you find your mind flipping from one to do to another, or your finger scrolling Instagram mindlessly, or your jam packed schedule, or your schedule jam packed for days, consider what are you avoiding finding and being with in the space. It is surely a practice over a perfect but I assure you that the fruits of this conversation are deeply transformational. They will deeply impact your experience of your life and your relationships, the ability to be fully present and take in the beauty all around you. You I wait. I want to. I want to re recap that last closing again, so where I said the ability to be fully present. I want to start that over again. Haley, I having the willingness to create space and it is a practice over a perfect but I assure you, having the willingness to create space is deeply transformational. The ability to be fully present and take in the beauty around you, the capacity to still your mind and connect with your intuition, the willingness to honor your schedule, both time for work and time for play, the ability to access the wellspring of dreams and business visions that lie within you. In my mind, it is all accessible from a willingness to create space. Creating spaciousness in your mind and with your time is a gift that keeps on giving. It is certainly one that is on my heart and my mind as I learn how to take more space and to celebrate this new life that’s in my own life. Thank you so much for tuning in, and we will see you next week.